If someone you love has been diagnosed with breast cancer, chances are you found yourself in a new role: caregiver. Women with cancer need help from family and friends to cope with the diagnosis and get through treatment. This may seem overwhelming to you at times and lead to "burnout."
If you are stressed to the brink of burning out, you won't be terribly effective carrying out your caregiving duties. So while taking care of someone with cancer, remember to take care of yourself, too.
Caregiver burnout warning signs
To assess whether you might be suffering from burnout, answer these questions:
- Am I irritable or impatient?
- Have I withdrawn from my friends and normal activities?
- Am I always tired?
- Do I have a hard time getting to sleep or staying asleep?
- Do I feel numb, like I need to force myself to do basic things?
- Am I eating more than or less than usual?
- Can I find relief only through alcohol or drugs?
- Do I feel guilty that I'm not doing enough?
- Do I feel resentful of the work that I'm doing?
Talking with a counselor or your doctor or calling a breast cancer hotline may help.
Preventing burnout
How can you take care of yourself? Here are some tips:
- Exercise. Finding time to exercise may be a challenge, but you don't necessarily need to follow your regular workout routine. Go for a walk while your loved one is receiving treatment, or squeeze in some activity by waking up a little earlier. Exercise can help reduce stress and give you more energy.
- Eat well. It may be tempting to eat convenience foods while you're on the go, or it may be hard to find time to eat a meal at all. While you prepare healthy meals for your loved one, remember to tend to your own nutritional needs.
- Relax. Get a massage, practice visual imagery, meditate, or learn deep-breathing exercises to help alleviate stress.
- Keep a journal. Writing down what you're going through may help you sort through your feelings.
- Join a caregiver support group. Talking with others who have similar experiences may help you feel connected. Contact your local chapter of the American Cancer Society for a support group near you.
- Ask for help. You can't do it all. When friends or relatives offer help, give them a specific task, such as driving the carpool, making meals, or running errands.
- Take a day off. Make time — even if you don't think you need it — to pursue a hobby, go to a movie, or do something else that makes you happy. Whether it's 10 minutes of knitting or a daylong outing once a week, the bottom line is to find a way of recharging that works for you.
Recommended reading
Preventing Caregiver Burnout, by James R. Sherman, 1996.
When Someone You Know Has Cancer, by Danarae Pomeroy, 1996.
If someone you love has been diagnosed with breast cancer, chances are you found yourself in a new role: caregiver. Women with cancer need help from family and friends to cope with the diagnosis and get through treatment. This may seem overwhelming to you at times and lead to "burnout."
